Day 5

So today made day 5 of my journey! I'm still new at this and I will be for like the first month, but I swear I feel a difference and I feel it getting easier and more of a habit each day I stick with it. Today I didn't go to the gym in the morning because I had work at 8am and was EXHAUSTED! I wish I did though because I really LOVE working out in the morning, as much as a dread waking up, it makes me feel amazing all day. So fresh and energized, idk I can't explain it lol. So Eddie and I went to the gym after work, which was still good but it wasn't a GREAT day. Today was chest and triceps... and let me tell you my triceps felt like I lifted a body builder lol they felt so good afterwards... like a good kind of sore, like I knew that I worked that out. Instead of doing the elyptical, today was my bike day. Usually, I would be like yeah I love the bike and you know why? Because I barely work out and I don't sweat!! But today I hated it because of that same reason.... when I leave the gym now I WANT to be sweaty; I want to feel that I just had an awesome workout. Mon, Wed, Fri are my bike days and when Wednesday comes around I have to step it up and increase it as if I were biking up a hill, so that's where I went wrong today. But again, I'm not like mad at myself or disappointed because after the gym I could of went to Wendy's and got chicken nuggets... actually I was really hungry so Eddie and I went to Applebee's and got water with lemon and a grilled chicken wrap with cheese, tomatoes, lettuce a whole bunch of good stuff and instead of fries we ordered a baked potato. 

I know that I'm serious this time because I went to Applebee's and ordered a baked potato? That's so not me, I would have loved to dig into those ketchup-y french fries lol but I dug into a baked potato instead. The good thing about myself is that I love food, healthy and bad foods but I just loved bad foods like french fries more. However, it's not like I don't LOVE good foods, because I could eat a sweet potato everyday, grilled chicken and veggies.... so at least that part isn't too much of a struggle. I just have to try new foods and new recipes so that I don't get bored. Right now my favorite thing is Jenn-O turkey burgers and the steamable frozen bags of veggies. sooooo yummy!

On another note, I feel like I'm becoming more open about this diet. I am starting to be more confident and I don't care about my belly and how I look at the gym or anywhere honestly. When I lose the weight I'll be even cuter than I am now haha ;) I can't wait to have the confidence I did back when I lost 40 pounds in high school and I won't lie I did look good! I can't wait to go clothes shopping and try on bathing suits next summer.... goodbye 1 pieces hello bikinis... well maybe not bikinis but tankinis!! maybe i'll get one of those full piece bathing suits that has the cut out sides... those are hot!! I can't wait to finally get the clothes I've been dying to wear! I'm gonna change to a new me... I'll always be the same person but I'm just gonna be healthy and happier. I've even been pampering myself and doing more things for me lately. I've been going to bed when I'm tired so that I have enough sleep, putting makeup on, talking to old friends, I got a haircut (that I've been meaning to get for months now!), and I even got my first bikini wax! I feel like a different woman than I was last week. Last week this was all a dream... actually being motivated, actually doing it... and now I'm living it. It feels great, and I haven't even seen results yet. I wonder how I'm gonna sound when I actually lost 20 pounds? Guess we'll have to wait and see...

Peace & Love!